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Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste
"Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste" is the 12th episode of Season 7. It originally aired on January 11, 2010. Plot Jake's Girlfriend Trouble Charlie hears Jake trying to write a song for his ex-girlfriend, whom he caused to break up with Jake after encouraging Jake to cheat on her. He tries to help Jake with advice but Jake gets shot down anyway. Alan and Herb's Friendship After yet another bad dating experience Alan tries to get Charlie to go out to eat with him, saying he craves human connection. Charlie shoots him down but about that time Herb comes to drop Jake off. So Alan asks if Herb wants to go grab a bite to eat with him. Herb is nervous at first, but Alan makes a joke that they have something in common: they're both not sleeping with Judith. So Herb agrees and they have a wonderfully dorky time eating at the Mall and telling silly jokes to each other. Then Judith calls, Herb is honest and tells her he's there with Alan. Judith apparently is quite upset by this. Herb tells her they'll talk when they get home. He then asks Alan how work's going but quickly interrupts him and heads home to Judith. They make plans for an outing tomorrow. But when Alan goes to pick Herb up, Judith meets him at the door and tells him she and Herb have decided the friendship is unnatural. Alan gets angry and goes around the house, calling to Herb and throwing a small rock at the window. A Romeo and Juliet scene then takes place between the two, ending with Herb trying to climb out the window on the rose trellis and falling. Judith comes to the window and demands to know what's happening and Alan takes off, Herb calling for him to take him with him. Back home, Alan, Jake and Charlie are sitting on the couch in sorrow. Charlie is reminded that it's Sunday and runs off as his girlfriend's coming home. Jake gets a phone call from a girl and takes off. Alan daydreams about Herb before hearing a knock at the door. It's Herb, saying they don't have much time since Judith thinks he's at physical therapy. The show ends on that bromance moment. Cast *Charlie Sheen *Jon Cryer *Angus T. Jones *Marin Hinkle *Conchata Ferrell *Jennifer Bini Taylor Title quote from Jake, naming what he loves. Charlie names the first two before Jake names all three. Quotes *'Herb': Alan, wait! I'm coming with you! *'Alan': But how? Be careful, you big galoot. *'Herb': I'm okay. I'm okay! (creaking) I'm not okay! *'Alan': Oh, God! Herb, talk to me! *'Herb': (groans) *'Judith': What's going on out here?! *'Herb': Alan, wait! Take me with you! ---- *'Jake': I miss Celeste. *'Charlie': I miss Chelsea. *'Alan': I miss Herb. Uh, I mean, I mean, "Sex and the City." I miss "Sex and the City." *'Charlie:' Yeah Alan, that's much less gay. *'Alan:' I guess that's just what our lives have come down to; three pathetic, lonely guys watching television on a Sunday night. *'Charlie:' Oh, crap, it's Sunday night! Chelsea's flying into LAX! *'Alan:' You're gonna pick her up? *'Charlie:' No, I'm gonna call her a cab and take a Viagra. *'Alan:' Well, buddy, I guess it's you and me. *'Jake:' No disrespect, Dad, but that just makes it worse. I said, "No disrespect." Why doesn't that ever work?(cell phone rings) *'Jake:' Hello. Yeah this is Jake. Oh, hi Nicole. Yeah, I broke up with Celeste. Now? Sure. See ya in a few. I'm gonna go meet Nicole at the pier. *'Alan: '''Who's Nicole? *'Jake:' I'm not really sure. ---- *'Alan': Herb. *'Herb': We haven't got much time. Judith thinks I'm in physical therapy. *'Alan''': Well, then let's make the most of it. Trivia *Despite her name being in the title, Celeste Burnett does not appear. *In the season 7 DVD gag reel, a deleted or alternate scene is shown with Alan heading in the house and Jake preparing to go to Celeste's house with his acoustic guitar strapped on, wearing shorts and a T-shirt. The scene ends with Angus T. Jones bursting in to laughter. *This is Tinashe's last appearance on Two and a Half Men. * Evelyn does not appear in this episode. Category:Episodes Category:Season 7